Day 88

I've almost completed 3 full months and about to start the 4th. It actually feels like a lot longer than that but then again I had originally set off to do a "90-day challenge" and here I am approaching that timeframe, ready to move way past it. I've had a tough couple of weeks, and my tragic visit to the mall yesterday didn't help things at all. In fact the low-self esteem carried over into today, and sitting around bored at work, looking out into the overcast day just put me into the lowest of lows. I felt fat, disgusting, lazy, inadequate ...basically every negative feeling you could think of. I really had to push myself to eat well, and I did do it but it was tough. And I actually feel a lot better through the day knowing that I was on the right track yesterday AND today and hopefully the rest of the week. However I got some clothes in the mail and when I tried them on out of 10 items only 3 fit...I started to feel awful again but I just shrugged it off and the positive spin I put on it is that I'll be getting a decent amount of money back once I make the return, haha. I was supposed to go to Crossfit this morning but my back was still hurting (FINALLY feels better now, days later). I will 100% be going to spin class tomorrow night and hopefully crossfit thursday and/or friday. And even though we are having people over on sunday I would like to try and get in an early-morning workout before they arrive. I really REALLY want to push myself to do it.

Here is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

-2 slices whole wheat toast with 1tbsp reduced-sugar peanut butter and 1tbsp reduced-sugar strawberry jam
*This was the first time I was trying this jam, got it at trader joe's...it was still sweet, reduced sugar definitely doesn't make a difference in taste at all! I'm almost done with this jar of peanut butter, it's peter pan brand and after i'm finished i would like to look for something a little more natural
-1/2c almond milk
*Can't believe how used to this I am! Remember when I thought it was gross???

Snack:

-18 blue corn tortilla chips (serving size) with 4 tbsp salsa
*YUMMM (except the salsa spilled all over the inside of my lunch box)

Lunch:

-1c TJ's fried rice with 4 steamed chicken veggie dumplings
*Good, and I DIDNT use any sauces at all this time!! But I forgot to add veggies which I definitely need to get into the habit of doing.
-1 blueberry greek yogurt
*Chobani is still the tried-and-true best tasting brand of greek yogurt

Snack:

-1 macintosh apple
*With a coating of salsa. ew. lol

Dinner:

-Veggie burger on whole wheat bun with 1 slice lowfat swiss, 1 tbsp ketchup and chopped red onion
*The veggie burgers I've been buying are Dr. Praeger's and while they are higher in calories than say, Morningstar Farms, they have way more natural ingredients and taste phenomenal.

Snack:

-2(Serving size) TJ's mini ice cream sandwiches
*AH THESE WERE SO GOOD! Basically mint chocolate chip ice cream between 2 oreo halves. Tastes as good as it sounds!
-1 bite of homemade pound cake crumbs
*Made by my baking-impaired sister. Every thing she bakes (no, seriously, EVERY, single thing) doesn't work. The poundcake "fell" in the middle and after much argument she finally admitted to trying to "halve" the recipe herself without keeping proper ratios haha. It did taste good though!

Now:

-1 cup hot black mango tea
*UNSWEETENED!!!

THANK GOD I did well today. I think I would be in an even WORSE mood if I had f*cked up again. I just need to stay positive, grab a hold of myself and keep moving forward. *I think I can*I think I can*I think I can*