Day 53

Finally back on track and it feels so good! I went to the gym, ate well, drank water, my first "100%" day in about a week...I can breathe a sigh of relief knowing that I did well! ALSO, kind of big news, as you know I weighed myself the other day and lost 10lbs. That was great and all but I felt like it wasn't really much to lose in 2 months, that I should have maybe lost more? Well just for the hell of it I decided to take my measurements yesterday...Now at the beginning of this whole endeavor, I charted out my measurements (arms, thighs, etc) and this is what I found:

January 8, 2011:

Chest (Not Bust): 43
Right Arm (bicep): 12
Left Arm (bicep): 12
Waist: 39.25
Hips: 39
Right Thigh: 27
Left Thigh: 28
"Bulge" (i named this one myself for the area at the top of my thighs): 47.5

February 27, 2011:

Chest (Not Bust): 40
Right Arm: 11.5
Left Arm: 11.5
Right Thigh: 24
Left Thigh: 25
"Bulge": 44.5

Loss:

Chest: 3 in.
Right & Left arm: .5inch/each
Hips: 35
Right & Left thigh: 3 in/each
Bulge: 3 inches

Total inches lost: 13.5!!!

This is awesome news! Now believe me I'm sure there is room for error, but not so much room that I could make that many mistakes...I could understand being off by anywhere from .5-2 inches but not 3 or more. Just to make sure, I will have my mom measure me tomorrow since she is the one who did it the first time! Glad to see my hard work has paid off...I guess even though I've only lost 10lbs, I've been reshaping my body and probably gaining some muscle, so I am in a really good mood about this :-)

That being said, here is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

NONE! I woke up at noon!

Lunch:

-Trader Joe's frozen enchiladas
*These were really good!

Snack:

-11 espresso pillows
-1 dark chocolate caramel wedge
*Together, these make up one serving...and the above caramel wedge was my last :-(

Dinner:

-My leftover cheesecake factory salad 
*So I checked out what was in it just so I could kind of break it down, and here is what is in the salad: lettuce, black beans, corn, avocado, fried onions, grilled chicken, dressing...so when you break it down the worst thing in the is the dressing and fried onions...and in my case tonight there was only 1 left in the salad since i ate the others the other night!

Snack:

-1 greek yogurt with 1 crunched up trader joe's granola bar mixed in
*hit the spot

Water: 

-2.5 bottles

Exercise:

-Spin Class: 1 hr.

I'm glad I was able to get over the mistakes I made last week...I now have a renewed spirit for taking this all the way :-)

Day 52

Today could have been better. It's ok though, this week really wasn't that great as far as eating was concerned, but tomorrow is a new week (plus I ran out of $$ so I can't exactly go out to eat!) I didn't go to the gym today but I did go and play tennis and was running around a lot, mainly because my friend can't aim when she hits so I was running every which way around the court...I was totally ok with it though! Here is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

-2 slices whole grain toast with 1tbsp peanut butter
*I decided to start cutting down the peanut butter intake a bit, so I only used 1 tbsp instead of 2.
-1 cup vanilla unsweetened almond milk

Lunch:

-1 Trader Joe's frozen spinach lasagna
*This was just ok...actually in hindsight I shouldn't have eaten it and I should have just waited until we went to Friday's haha

Dinner:

-1/2 plate of Fridays nachos
*Good, crunchy, salty yummm
-3 pieces of Friday's sesame chicken strips appetizer
*Too sweet for me. My friend enjoyed these though.
-2 bud light lime beers
*First alcoholic drinks in a LONG time! (116 cal/each)...could be better, but I really REALLY enjoyed these...I haven't had any real drinks in so long, it was worth it.

Snack:

-1 greek blueberry yogurt
*Always good
-1 bite of a kashi cookie
*Dad bought them, I think he was trying to be nice...I took one bite and put that shit in the garbage, because that's what it tasted like!! Also, it's 140/cal a cookie...for that many calories couldn't they make it taste good?

Water:

-1 bottle
*Need to step this up!!

Exercise:

-1 hour of tennis
*So much fun, glad the weather is getting warmer!

So, I researched the Friday's nutrition facts and here is what I found...The nachos were 1860!!! (if that was even right, since Friday's doesn't give out their nutrition info and I found this on an alternative website)...I'm not sure where all those calories are, because there wasn't much cheese on our nachos at all, there was a lot of chicken though...unless they are counting the guacamole and sour cream that was on the side? The sesame chicken strips were 1430...I also don't really see how that's possible because although they are breaded and fried each strip is really more like a nugget...oh well looks like I'm being strict this week and really working myself out! I have faith...I've come so far there is no way I'm turning back!

Day 51

So, I weighed myself this morning....and....(drumroll please)...I lost a total of 10 lbs!! I know it might not sound like much, and 10 lbs in almost 2 months doesn't sound like much either, BUT If you think about it, I've been doing this for 7 weeks now, I only started working out about halfway through, and the "diet" itself isn't super strict...so considering all that, 10 lbs is fantastic! I love that I'm making such good progress. I'm now at 181 down from 191...but what's sad is that I remember when I used to weigh myself and be in the 170's, the 160's and even the 150's...I was there and I just need to get back there! I mean as much as it seems like progress I hate that I was much thinner and just took it for granted because it's so much work to lose weight. I do admit though that in addition to losing weight, I am noticing changes in my endurance, energy, and tolerance for physical activity. That in itself is a huge achievement! I'm not going to quit anytime soon, and while I don't eat perfectly every day, I at the very least 1) exercise regularly (and enjoy it) 2) Don't drink anything other than water, almond milk, unsweetened iced teas and coffee (and I've pretty much cut out alcohol as well...I haven't had anything since the 2 beers I had (those were EXACTLY a month ago!) 3) Eat smaller meals and don't eat any less than 3 hours before bedtime...I'm definitely making progress and I have a much easier time accepting my mistakes...for the first time I'm being REALISTIC with my goals and with my eating habits. I will never be successful on any commercial structured diet plan (Atkins, Weight Watchers, etc)...not because they're not effective but because they aren't right for ME. I also wouldn't be successful in any plan that is very strict or that eliminates a food group (i.e. no carbs, or just eating plain grilled chicken with a vegetable). I'm so happy right now, happy that I've learned myself better, and happy that I've been able to really take this seriously and stick with it this long. It's also been really nice to see people coming out of the woodwork to support me...it only makes me want to keep going! So thanks, everybody, for your support!

Now as far as food is concerned, I would like a little more structure for myself, because I seem to have allowed myself a lot of freedom this week. Maybe I can just keep everything in line Monday-Friday and kind of have fun on the weekend? I don't know. I went out to dinner today with a friend and totally let go, and I really did enjoy myself, but I would like these kinds of days to be less frequent. On a positive note, I'm going to go play tennis AND go to the gym tomorrow so I can work off what I ate today haha...which is the following:

Breakfast:

-1 packet plain oatmeal with half a banana
*still really good and keeps me full


Lunch:

-2oz whole wheat penne with 3 chopped asparagus spears, 1/2c stir fry veggies (no seasoning), 1 tsp olive oil and 1 tsp grated parmesan cheese
*This was so boring. haha

Snack:

-1/2 california roll w/ soy sauce
*Always good!

Dinner:

-2 slices of appetizer bread and 1 butter patty
*haven't had bread and butter in so long, it was SO good!
-1/2 of the barbecue ranch chicken salad (grilled chicken, lettuce, black beans, fried onions, ranch dressing, bbq sauce)
*OK so online this salad has a whopping 959 calories...BUT I only ate half (480 cal), and boxed up the rest. Whether or not I eat it tomorrow hasn't been decided yet haha. Really, the worst part of this was the dressing, bbq sauce and fried onions
-1 glass unsweetened iced tea
*I actually didn't drink any of this though!

Dessert:

-1/4 slice chocolate raspberry truffle cheesecake
*Online a slice of this has 1,079 calories!! CAN YOU EFFING BELIEVE THAT?! Well my friend and I split it and TOGETHER we only managed to eat half. So 1/4 of 1079 is about 270 (I'll round up to 300 for good measure!) So in actuality it wasn't as bad as I had suspected. I'm glad I didn't finish anything in its entirety!

Snack:

-2 italian layer cookies
*these were the last in our house. I was supremely disappointed because they were on the table, not in the fridge and the fact that they were room temp changed their taste dramatically...oh well :(

Not the best day but you know what? The bottom line is I'm happy, I'm doing really well, working out and losing weight and I just want to keep with it. I just need to make sure that I keep the eating in check! It's so hard to go off track (especially when you're bored) but I know I have the strength to make it happen.

Day 50

I'm about 10 or so days away from the 2-month mark! Actually, it feels like I've been doing this much longer than 2 months haha. When you're trying not to eat the stuff you normally like to eat time goes by a whole hell of a lot slower. Anyway, this isn't going to be a long post because I'm tired! Now I normally would have gone to the gym today, but my legs were absolutely killing me still, so that was definitely not going to happen. I will be going on Sunday, though. Anywho this is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

-1 regular egg, 1 slice whole wheat toast, 1trader joe's hash brown with 1 tbsp ketchup
*This was really good, I just made sure to keep the amounts of everything in moderation. And to think, I used to have like 3 eggs, 3 slices of buttered toast, 3 hash browns and a buttload of ketchup. I've come a long way!
-1/2c unsweetened vanilla almond milk
*Starting to really like it!

Lunch:

-1 trader joe's panko-breaded tilapia fillet
*Really liking these!
-1 serving of trader joe's mashed potatoes
*Makes a great side dish, and the serving size is nice and small

Dinner:

-1 trader joe's frozen meal: spinach & ricotta tortellini
*All their frozen meals are good. Period.

Snack:

-1 italian layer cookie
*These cookies are seriously like crack.

Snack:

-fruit (2 kiwis, 1/2 banana, 10 blueberries)
*God I love fruit.

Snack:

-2 forkfuls of chocolate cake with vanilla frosting
*everyone in my house kept talking about how awful this cake was (my sister made it) so i avoided it for 2 days...well I wanted to see what everyone was talking about so I took a forkful, and shit it was good! Or maybe it wasn't good but my judgement is skewed because I haven't eaten cake in a while. Either way, I had to have a second forkful.
-1 swig (literally from the carton) of unsweetened chocolate almond milk
*had to wash the cake down somehow!

Definitely could have done without that cake. I suppose someone could say I could have done without the cookie as well, but I never get to see them, plus I limited myself to just 1. There are only a couple left anyway and I'm sure someone will get to them before I can finish them off. I still feel good, I know I have my days but I'm really trying to be good, and even though I have a really hard time staying away from the sugar on the whole I have been doing a really good job and I think I deserve a pat on the back! I've been keeping the eating out to a minimum, I haven't drank ANY soda, juice, sweetened iced tea, gatorade, energy drinks, etc this entire time...and I was never an alcoholic by any means, but I had 2 beers in the entire 2 months that I've been doing this, and I just think that is awesome. I'm 25, like going out with my friends, but have turned down a multitude of invites for the sake of staying healthy! Go me!

Day 49

I felt really good (and really sore) today. My legs only hurt minimally last night from the kettlebell workout...today they were considerably worse, and tonight it is almost unbearable, and now my arms/shoulders hurt too! What's really funny is that the workouts themselves weren't TERRIBLY difficult, and I only worked out for about a half hour and the entire thing was VERY low impact...I just can't believe how I feel considering the workout itself did not feel like a big deal as I was going it. I'm very happy that I feel sore! My eating was good today, and for WHATEVER reason I didn't have any real hunger attacks or manic cravings...if I could figure out why then hell I'd do it every day to prevent myself from wanting to eat crap! haha

Here is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

-Whole wheat french toast: (2 slices whole grain bread dipped in 1 whole egg with 1/4c sugar-free syrup)
*This was good because I made it the right way this time. Last time I just used carton egg whites which were runny and soaked the bread all the way through which totally didn't work. This time I used 1 regular egg which made all the difference.
-1/2c unsweetened vanilla almond milk
*definitely getting used to it haha

Snack:

-3 cups (literally 8oz per cup) of decaf coffee with some nondairy coffee creamer and 1 sweet & low
*Hallelujah i remembered to drink decaf. I didn't have any panic attacks today as a result lol...I could have done without the nondairy creamer but it's all we had and in exchange i reduced the amount of sweetener i used.

Dinner:

-1 pesto-marinated chicken breast
*from trader joe's. It was good. Not the best thing ever but not gross by any means. It was actually really good over the bed of lettuce, and served cold.
-salad mix with 1 tbsp olive oil, balsamic vinegar, salt, pepper & oregano
*yummmm lol

Snack:

-3 italian layer cookies
*In case you don't know what I'm talking about, here's a generic picture of them...they are absolutely hands down my favorite cookie. My sis bought them. Effing $12/pound!! She bought 3 POUNDS!!!

Snack:

-1 red pear

Snack:

-2 dark chocolate caramel wedges
*i looked at the cookie picture and wanted another, so instead of eating a cookie i ate my healthy chocolate.

Water: 

-1 glass
*definitely not enough!!

But I feel great, can't wait to weigh myself mon!

Day 48

Ok, I need a serious kick in the ass. I notice that for the last week, with the exception of 2 or 3 days, I have eaten at least 1 thing each day that shouldn't be in my food options...I'm not about to get down on myself, but COME ON, ME!! I'm a little upset that I get swayed so easily and don't seem to have the willpower to turn down ANYTHING! It really bothers me! I just thank god that I have not slacked on the water and working out. That is really what is saving me from totally losing my cool. You don't even want to know what I ate today (you will know, I would just prefer you didn't haha). But, on the upside (since I really should just be focusing on the positive) I did a great workout today, and it looks like I may be doing it a couple days a week from now on! A friend of mine owns a gym that specializes in training with kettlebells and I did an introductory session today. Now, I keep touting spinning as this be-all/end-all full-body workout that compares to nothing else. I also bragged that I have thighs of steel. The workout today crushed all those claims. I felt my muscles trembling by the time I was finished (and I only did about 40 min, if even that!) and I was sore in places that I THOUGHT I had previously been working out already! Now don't get me wrong I still love spinning and will still obviously be doing it consistently...but cycling, treadmills and elliptical machines really can't substitute legitimate strength training, so in addition to what I'm already doing I'm going to try to add 2 days a week of the kettlebells to my exercise regimen. I will know my new workout schedule for sure in a couple days. Some things I learned in class are 1: I have pretty much no upper arm strength (i kind of already knew this) 2: I seem to pick up on form pretty easily, definitely a good thing 3) My leg squats leave much to be desired and 4) I am in better overall shape than I anticipated! There was another girl in the introductory class who was built very similarly to myself, and I was able to do all the workouts (and then some) whereas she couldn't. Now I am not even remotely criticizing her, but normally I am THAT GIRL...the one that can't finish an exercise and can't push herself the extra mile...but I think the month of slowly conditioning my body has at least gotten me noticeably more tolerant of exercising. I worked up a sweat and was sore but I wasn't so out of shape that I had to give up. It's really motivating to see myself gradually improving, at least in that regard! I also decided that I am going to hold off on weighing myself and try to put less importance on my actual body weight (in pounds) for now...if I am going to be strength training and building muscle, trying to constantly monitor my actual weight will probably be psychologically detrimental to me since I might not see the kind of number decline that I would like to see...I think I will weigh myself once a month instead of every couple weeks or every week. I will weigh myself Monday morning so I can kind of get a checkpoint/starting off point, but then after that it won't be until the end of March, end of April, and so on.

OK the part I've been dreading...my daily food diary

Breakfast:

-1 (pack of 2) Trader Joe's granola bars
*crumbly and messy and delicious

Lunch:

-3 pieces of KFC fried chicken
*OK in my defense I had NEVER had KFC before, someone heard me say this and returned with a bucket of chicken. There is a first time for everything. It was good but I pretty much felt sick all day after eating it.

Dinner:

-1 beef taco, 1 chicken burrito, rice
*The food ingredients were fresh and easily identifiable. The taco had seasoned fresh ground beef, lettuce, tomato & onions in a spicy red sauce...the burrito was simply seasoned grilled chicken in a flour tortilla with red sauce, guacamole and melted cheese on top. I ate the small serving of mexican rice on the side but didn't eat the refried beans.
-1 glass of unsweetened iced tea with 1 sweet & low
*My favorite thing to drink when eating out!

Dessert(?)

-1 small cappuccino with 1 sweet & low
*Mostly foam (which ended up staying at the bottom of the cup) and a very small amount of coffee (or espresso, whichever)...I recently read that a small cappuccino is one of the healthiest drinks you can order at a coffee shop. It was tasty too. Decaf next time though. Someone please remind me, DECAF!!!

So, as much as I didn't eat MUCH today, KFC certainly is one of the worst choices...although, the chicken underneath the breading is all white meat real chicken...hmm wonder what the nutrition facts are for those...I'm going to go look now! one sec...460 for all that I ate...wow that's actually NOT as bad as I thought! Not nearly! Ok I really don't feel so bad! I mean quality-wise it really isn't healthy since it's fried but I expected to earn 1,000 calories chowing that down so this is a relief! Note to self, "extra-crispy"=more calories. I can't find the nutrition information for the mexican restaurant I went to, but the portions were not big and everything was fresh and authentic so I'm not TOO concerned...I actually don't think I went as overboard as I originally thought...but I need to keep myself in check as far as food quality goes from now on because eating fried chicken is just dumb haha. Alright I don't feel so bad anymore. Let me just note that I had a cappuccino and it has amplified my panic mode. I seriously think that if we look back at any posts I've written after drinking late-night coffee I've been in panic mode and freaking out. At least it's predictable but MUST be kept to a minimum! And why can't I EVER remember to order decaf?? 

Day 47

Today was another good day! Tough though, because I worked at the salon which always leaves me kind of bored so I dig into my food way earlier than I need to, and I end up finishing breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks from 10-6 haha. I did at least make sure to drink water, that's of course always important. I made all the meals I ate today, using some new things I picked up at Trader Joe's, but everything I make is always a gamble. Just because you smother grilled chicken in sauce doesn't mean it won't taste like plain grilled chicken. In fact, every time I make grilled chicken no matter what I put on it it still tastes like plain grilled chicken! I think I'm going to start investing in marinades...haha Well here is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

-2 slices whole grain toast with 2 tbsp reduced-sugar peanut butter
*This keeps me really full and is just the sweetness I crave in the morning!
-1/2c unsweetened vanilla almond milk
*You know, I know I was not a fan of this at first, but after drinking the PLAIN (bleh!) almond milk last week this is a relief...I can DEFINITELY get used to this and I actually enjoyed it this morning!

Snack:

-1 peach greek yogurt
*never fails to be delicious

Lunch:

-1 veggie burger with 1/4c fat free cheddar, 1 tbsp ketchup on a trader joe's whole wheat bun
*These veggie burgers are really good, but at almost 200 cal/each I wonder if they are really worth it...the morningstar farms burgers taste just fine and less than 100/cal each...Too bad I bought a huge box and have to wait to finish them all lol...Also the cheese was totally unnecessary

Snack:

-1 sugar-free vanilla pudding
*I always wish my tongue would reach the bottom :(

Dinner:

-1 4oz piece of grilled chicken with 1/4c indian masala sauce
*This was not good. 1/4c of sauce (which is a LOT for one piece of chicken) and all I tasted was grilled chicken. There was definitely something missing here! haha
-1 serving of mashed potatoes
*These were the frozen ones I bought from trader joe's yesterday...basically they look like little discs...you put 8 of them (1 serving size) in a bowl and nuke 'em for 2 min and POOF...mashed potatoes. These were really good!

Snack? Mini-meal?

-7 eggplant meatballs
*Listen. Sometimes I eat bad. We know this. But as I live and breathe, there are only 2 (yes 2) items of food that are my kryptonite. 1 is donuts. Hence the name of the blog. 2 are eggplant meatballs. My mom makes them, and it doesn't matter how stuffed, tired, aching, upset or busy i am. If I see them, I WILL eat them. There were 7 on the table to be divided amongst the rest of my family. I took the plate and ate them all myself. They are quite possibly my most favorite thing that my mom makes. In case you are all picturing a heap of huge round meatballs, each one is actually the size and shape of your thumb. They are kind of like an appetizer or side dish and so so scrumptious. They are made just like meatballs, but with eggplant instead of meat and they are irresistible. I so don't feel bad about that at all. Because in the 47 days I've been doing this, and despite the fact that I have eaten poorly on more than one occasion, this is probably the most delicious thing I've eaten in almost 2 months. It was worth every single solitary calorie.

Dessert:

-11 espresso pillows and 1 dark-chocolate caramel wedge
*I basically halved each serving size so that I could have a little of both. And then I persuaded my parents to try the espresso pillows and I think I now need to hide the tin!

I'm feeling really great, really healthy, I feel in control this week! Now tomorrow I just need to be careful because I'm going out to eat at night. BUT, I'm going to Tortuga's in princeton (which I have been to before) and they have great, authentic, fresh mexican food. PLUS the friend who I am going with is well-educated in nutrition so I have no doubts he will watch over me and help me make a good decision...he has helped me in many of these situations in the past! Also, a friend of mine who owns a gym has invited me to take an introductory course with him tomorrow so I'm REALLY excited about it! I haven't done much strength training at all since I started so I know it's going to be tough for me but I'm always looking to mix things up so I'm pumped about it. Will give a full report on how I (and my muscles) feel tomorrow night!

Day 46

Back on track and it feels great! Had a nice, easy day today, guilt-free!...Granted I managed to keep myself busy but still I ate wonderfully and worked out too. I could still be drinking more water but I'm working on it! I went to spin class today (Mondays aren't as fun as wednesdays though) and am so glad I'm back into it...I can't believe that just a month ago I was upset and missing spin and now here I am doing it twice a week again...it truly is my favorite workout! I also went to trader joe's again and got some really good buys...here is what I picked up!

-A pack of "pesto chicken" - fresh from their meat section, it's basically a few chicken breasts marinated in a pesto sauce...very low cal and high in protein!
-A tin of "espresso pillow" chocolates...they are "toffeed" espresso beans covered in dark chocolate and are fantastic!
-A bag of spinach
-A bag of salad mix
-A bag of frozen mashed potatoes...only 100 cal/serving!
-Frozen asparagus
-Frozen stir-fry vegetable mix
-Frozen meals: 2 pizzas, 1 tortellini meal, 1 filet of sole meal, 1 chicken enchilada meal, 1 spinach lasagna meal
-Masala sauce
-BBQ sauce
-Stir fry sauce
-Vanilla unsweetened almond milk

It's always nice to have things to work with...I bought the sauces so I could use them as marinades since it's really hard for me to eat chicken plain.

Trader Joe's is my favorite. haha.

Here is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

-1 packet plain oatmeal with 1/2 banana and 2 strawberries
*Still a favorite
-1/2c unsweetened chocolate almond milk
*If you're going to drink chocolate milk, go all the way...don't do it half-assed...this stuff tasted like crap!

Lunch:

-Chicken stir fry (1 4oz chicken breast, 1c stir fry veggie mix, 1/4c stir-fry sauce)
*This came SOOOOO good! But I DEFINITELY did not need 1/4c of the sauce. I can use a tablespoon and it would suffice.

Dinner:

-1 panko-breaded tilapia fillet with 1 tbsp ketchup
*Really good, takes 20 min in the oven but it's totally worth the wait...nice & crispy!
-6 asparagus spears
*These were good, and I ate them plain...no dressing, oil or butter

Snack:

-1c fat free cottage cheese with some blueberries & 1 strawberry
*Love the sweet/salty combo

Snack:

-22 pieces (serving size) "espresso pillows"
*Tasted like eating a latte haha

Water:

-1.5 bottles (going to go downstairs and get more now)

Exercise:

-Spin Class: 1 hr

Feeling really good today, super proud of myself and it feels great to have those bad days behind me! I can only go forward from here.

Day 45

So this weekend wasn't so good. I'm glad I can at least admit it and know that I will be committed to my healthy routine again tomorrow. The last few days I was trying to fight my cravings and instead was binging on food that wasn't even satisfying. Today I ate unhealthy but it at least finally satisfied my needs and I have no regrets because I know how devoted I have been to this whole endeavor and I have no doubts I will be able to stick with the plan again tomorrow. I have been doing so well up until this point, I've lost weight consistently and I'm making my first real effort towards working out. It's probably the first time in years that I've put in this much effort towards being healthier...I can honestly say that the last time I did so was when I was 18, the summer before I started college!...7 years later and I'm finally taking it seriously again. And, another first, each time I "mess up" I don't feel guilty or feel like "yelling" at myself...this whole forgive and forget thing is really new to me but I'm so happy that it's continuing this way! I'm being my biggest supporter instead of my own worst enemy for the first time. I also have friends who are really supportive of me and willing to help in every way they can. They tried to stop me from eating badly today but I already knew it was going to happen and just accepted it, but they definitely get points for trying...they were able to stop me yesterday when I really needed it!
I worked out again before breakfast today but tried not to overwork myself this time, and I ended up being just fine...I also made sure that despite eating poorly I at least worked out and drank only water - and plenty of it! I feel like it's the least I can do to somewhat justify the bad decisions I occasionally make...I'm proud to say that the only liquids I've consumed consist of unsweetened tea, water, milk & coffee...no juices, sugary drinks or sodas! That is a HUGE step for me, even more impressive to me than the good eating! I had, at one point, worked myself up to two EXTRA LARGE energy drinks a day (monster, amp, red bull) in addition to huge meals. So even though I still have a day where I just have to cut loose, I know that in terms of the big picture I'm making strides! Here is what I ate today:

Breakfast (after gym):

-1 kashi fruit & walnut bar
*I might as well have not eaten this at all, since I ended up eating lunch about 10 min later...tsk tsk.

Lunch:

-2 slices of pizza (1 tomato, 1 cheese)
*The first one was gross, which is why I then had a slice of good ole' cheese.
-1 slice of a turkey sandwich (turkey, american, tomato lettuce & onion)
*this was good and a better choice than the italian hoagie filled with fatty meats and oil!
-2 chicken fingers with approx 1 tbsp honey mustard
*They were delicious...no regrets about these haha

Snack:

-1 "now and later"
*My friend rationed 1 to me then hid the rest so I couldn't break into them...very smart of her.
-1 tbsp reduced sugar peanut butter with 1/2 apple
*Normally I would to 2 tbsp pb and a full apple but I really don't think that's necessary!

Snack:

-2 bites of a chocolate chip cookie
*annnnnnd totally worth it.

Dinner:

-1 bowl of chicken lo mein
*better than the other crap my sister had ordered the other night!
-10 baked blue corn tortilla chips with salsa
*"guiltless gourmet" chips...never heard of them, bought by my sister...they were good!

Snack:

-2 dark chocolate caramel wedges
*one of my favorite buys.

Water:

-3 bottles

Exercise:

-Treadmill: 30min, "weight loss" program, level 2, 3.4mph (no running)
-Elliptical: 30min, "random" program, level 1
*I was the nerd in the gym watching pirates of the caribbean...it makes time go by much faster!

Looking back at the food, it definitely could have been better, BUT, comparing it to my eating habits in the past, it could have been worse. Much, much, much worse. I know the large amounts of food I am capable of eating at my worst moments and this was really nothing. Plus I got in an hour's worth of cardio and plenty of water so I tried to offset it a little! I'm going to Trader Joe's again tomorrow, which usually gets me revamped (I'm running low on supplies anyway). Hopefully Definitely, by this time tomorrow night, the food list will differ greatly from what you see above!

Days 43 & 44

Day 43

I Didn't get to bed until SERIOUSLY late last night, which is why I didn't post. Yesterday was not so great. Today, much better. I started off doing alright yesterday but had some difficulties later on...I think it all started when I went to the gym. Now, normally I get up, eat breakfast, wait 3 hours then go to the gym. Well yesterday I woke up later than I had wanted, plus I had plans in the afternoon so I decided to go to the gym BEFORE breakfast instead. I got dressed and ran out of the house. Well  I spent an hour working out at the gym and became MAJORLY overheated (I made it through my workout, and my heart rate wasn't overly-high, but my face was the color of a tomato and I was sweating like crazy). I hydrated and had my car windows down all the way home to deal with the heat I was feeling! I had an insane headache since working out, which followed me all day despite taking more than the recommended dose of tylenol. My stomach hurt so I didn't even eat a big lunch, and didn't plan on eating a big dinner. Well I was trying to do a technical project late into the night which was getting me ridiculously frustrated, PLUS my sister ordered chinese food, so I pretty much just ate myself out of frustration. The chinese food was not the best and my stomach hurt really badly the rest of the night (on a good note, my headache went away). I never really thought I was much of an emotional eater, but then again I haven't really been stressed out in 43 days...I guess this was the true test and I failed with flying colors. I didn't realize how much I depended on food to make me feel better when I couldn't find relief any other way. In the end, it ended up being less about the food, because it wasn't delicious, I wasn't satisfied, and it made me feel seriously sick. Curious as to what ended up in my stomach? Wonder no more...

Breakfast:

NONE!

Lunch: (Right after the gym)

-Trader Joe's green curry & rice shrimp meal
*Good but REALLY spicy :(

Snack:

-1 sugar-free chocolate pudding with 1 banana
*always good

Dinner:

-1 can of healthy choice chicken & rice soup
*the reason this is so "healthy"? = it's mostly broth. Rip off!

Dessert?

Both from the polish deli:
-1 piece of poppy-seed sweetbread
*came highly recommended, it was just ok but it was my first time trying it
-1 slice of coconut/fruit cheesecake
*really good, and actually much MUCH lighter than american cheesecake. I didn't feel gross or guilty after eating it (although it couldn't have really been a HEALTHY snack now could it?)

Fourthmeal?

-1 egg roll
*YUM
-1 bowl of some kind of pork and fried rice
-Effing gross.
-2 slices of deli pork
*2 different types (from the polish deli) = 1 was good, 1 was not.
-1 large glass of chocolate almond milk
*delish...not quite sure if this is nutritionally better than regular chocolate milk though.

Exercise:

-Treadmill: 30 min on "weight-loss" program, 3.4 mph,  level 2, ran twice
-Elliptical: 30 min on "weight-loss" program, last 5 minutes did "glute kicker"

Water: 

-3 bottles

I felt so awful after eating poorly...not towards myself, I wasn't angry at myself. And I'm really really happy that instead of turning on myself I instead try to figure out WHY I did what I did...punishing myself only led to self-destruction in the past, so now I try to find out how I can right the wrongs...I think going to the gym without eating breakfast set the stage for me to mess up...my body needed fuel and I didn't provide it so already there was an imbalance which was then amplified by my emotional frustration until it just exploded into a binging session (granted in the past my binge-meal would have been much larger so that's a start). I would like to get to the point where I find another outlet for frustration, stress, anger and sadness instead of food!

Day 44

Today was a MUCH better day. It was ALMOST bad but for once, for ONCE I had the willpower (and good friends) to keep it in check. I worked all day so it was definitely tough to space out my meals, I'm  used to this by now haha. But I'd rather space out my meals wrong than eat things I shouldn't so it's a small price to pay. Here is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

-1 kashi whole grain waffle with 1/4c syrup, some blueberries & 1/2 a banana
*This was the last waffle in the box, and I overcalculated the fruit/syrup mixture and the ratio was SO off that once I poured the hot fruit syrup on top it essentially dissolved my waffle. I was sad but I ate the mush pile anyway.

Snack:

-1/2c fat free cottage cheese with some blueberries
*Funny how every time I eat this there is someone standing by who says "ewwww cottage cheese".
-1 bite of a donut from the polish deli
*just ok. Did not taste like an american donut. Tasted more like a zeppole and had confectioner's sugar sprinkled on it

Lunch:

-2oz whole wheat pasta with sauteed broccoli, cauliflower, peppers, garlic & 1 tbsp red pepper spread (all mixed together)
*a failed experiment of mine. FAILED.

Dinner:

-1 chicken sausage link with sauteed onions, peppers & mushrooms with 1/4c fat free cheddar cheese on a whole grain bun
*Good! I love sausage.
-1 sugar-free chocolate pudding

Snack:

-1 bite of a pretzel rod. 
*it was chocolate covered on one end. I bit the pretzel end, and my friend ate the chocolate end haha.
-2 dark-chocolate caramel wedges
*love these but i'm almost all run-out!

Water:

-3 bottles

See? did MUCH better today. Although on my drive home I was craving bad food really badly. I wanted the chinese from the fridge (even though I already knew it wasn't good) or homemade pizza that my dad made today...when I got home I was THIS CLOSE to eating it, so I texted a friend and told her I was on the verge of overeating so she texted me some words of encouragement and I talked myself through it too and I'm so glad I did...I feel really proud of myself for having the willpower to not cave in this time! Wish I could keep this up all the time.  Tomorrow I will be going to the gym & working all day so hopefully I am occupied enough to not have cravings!

Day 42

Today was a little tough for me and I messed up a bit but, as I've been saying a lot lately, it's OK and I just want to go forward. I'm kind of bummed that the only days I do really really well are the days where I'm so busy I just forget the urge to eat. I wish I had better willpower so that on days when I just sat around I could easily say no to temptation. Today, for example, included a lot of sitting around and I just constantly wanted to eat. I went to a friend's house tonight and they ordered pizza, and even though I had eaten all my meals for the day already I managed to have enough willpower to last only an hour until I finally caved and had 2 slices. Why can't I just see it, know I shouldn't eat it, and say NO?? Why is there a battle of wits in my head? And why can't I be strong enough so that I have that mentality constantly? It's really disheartening to think that I can be so easily swayed...up until now really the only way I've rejected temptation is by literally avoiding it. I don't go out to eat for fear of being tempted. I don't go to bars for fear of being tempted. I don't go out really with anyone anymore because I know there will be unhealthy food involved, and the only time I DO agree to go out to dinner is when I research the restaurant first. I have to be able to be realistic and know that there will be times when I end up in a place serving fried and fatty foods and I want to have the strength to say no without fighting myself on it. And I drank 4 bottles of water today, which of course would keep me hydrated, but after the pizza (which I know had sugar in the dough and sauce) I am suddenly super thirsty but I'm not craving water I'm craving sugary drinks. I must admit I'm proud that to date I haven't drank any sugary drinks since starting this whole thing, but still, it's crazy that "sugar breeds sugar"...the fact that I ate the pizza left me wanting to down a bottle of gatorade or iced tea or juice...but I'm going to sit here and suck down another water bottle and hope that it will quench my thirst for now. I know I'm doing well, and I'm impressed with myself so far, I really am. I just want to feel like I'm growing STRONGER instead of growing WEAKER. I figured after a month I'd at the very least have stronger willpower but I don't think I do and that's frustrating and disheartening. Anyway, here is what I gobbled down today:

Breakfast:

-1/4c egg whites with 1/4c fat free cheddar and 2 tbsp salsa
*good i guess, trying to get rid of these damn egg whites! should have bought the small carton...
-1 trader joe's hash brown
*yum
-1 cup coffee with 2 tbsp nondairy fat free creamer and 1 sweet & low
*delicious but I need to make sure I limit my caffeine intake

Lunch:

-1 trader joe's frozen panko-breaded tilapia fillet
-homemade french fries (1 small potato cut and salted and baked)
*fish & chips! healthy-style...except I cut the fries in an odd shape so they all burned.

Snack:

-1 pack of 2 trader joe's granola bars
*good and really filling

Dinner:

- 1 turkey burger with 1 slice lowfat swiss cheese, 1 tbsp ketchup, onions, a dash of worcestershire sauce on a trader joe's whole grain bun
*good but the worcestershire sauce kind of gave it a funky taste. I was experimenting. Also, after I opened my lunchbox and discovered that my wrapped up turkey burger was basically soaked with grease, I'm thinking an investment in a George Forman grill might be in order.

Other Dinner?

-2 slices plain pizza
*bad idea but so good haha

Snack:

-Some green seedless grapes
*i <3 fruit

Water:

-4 bottles

 That is all, goodnight. haha.

Day 41

Today was another good day! Plus I kept myself busy so it was easier to not be constantly wanting to eat. I woke up late then went to get my hair done then went right to the gym...these are the kind of days I love having my food already made! Makes it so much easier for me. I did spin class again tonight, didn't enjoy the music as much as I usually do but at least he switches up his playlist every single week so it gives us something new each time. Here is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

-2 kashi whole grain waffles with some blueberries and 1/4c sugar free syrup
*almost out of these...need to restock!
-1 cup almond milk

Lunch:

-1 homemade pizza (1 piece of whole wheat Naan, 2 thick slices of tomatoes, 1 chicken sausage link, 1/4c fat free mozzarella and 1 tbsp olive oil)
*This was really good, I could have made the bread crispier though...somehow...

Dinner:

-Stuffed chicken (1 4oz piece of chicken stuffed with chipotle hummus, 1 slice of lowfat deli ham and 1/4c fat free cheddar)
*yummy and satisfying! This was totally experimental.
-1 bowl of campbells select southwestern vegetable soup
*I only ate out the vegetables and left all the broth, as is my usual soup-eating habit.

Snack:

-1 strawberry greek yogurt
*:-)

Snack:

-2 raspberry-filled dark chocolates
*i don't like these as much as my caramel wedges. i've said this before. they're kinda unsatisfying. won't be buying them again!

Water:

-2 bottles
*need to get more of these in by the end of the night

Exercise:

-Spin Class: 1 hour
*my favorite!

Not much else new to report I'm afraid! Things are still going well, I already made my meals for tomorrow and am constantly experimenting with new recipes. There are some really good resources out there if you know where to look! The mayo clinic online actually has a ton of easy recipes for the health-conscious. I plan on doing a weigh-in sometime this weekend, I know I look different but I hope those numbers have gone down, even a little bit! ::Fingers Crossed::

Day 40

I'm currently 40 days in and still going strong. I made sure to drink lots of water today (so far 3 down and still have a bottle here in front of me). I worked all day, and work days are a little harder for me because I get bored and have a hard time spacing out my meals the way I'd like to. But I really tried this time and although I ate more often than every 3-4 hours, I managed to make it work. Here is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

-1 plain packet oatmeal with 1/2 a banana (sliced) and a few blueberries on top
*putting the banana in before heating the oatmeal makes this so delicious...the blueberries don't add much but the bananas sure do!

Snack:

-1 (pack of 2) trader Joe's granola bars 
*these are like the crunchy nature valley granola bars in the shiny green wrapper. just sweet enough too.

Lunch:

-1 balsamic/tomato glazed chicken breast with 1c couscous (leftover from last night)
*glad i had this already made!

Snack:

-1 sugar free pudding cup
-1 apple
*could have done without the apple, but, you know, it was just....there.

Dinner:

-1 trader joe's frozen margharita pizza
*this.was.amazing. It was especially good for a number of reasons. 1) instead of regular pizza dough the crust is buttery, chewy, flaky pastry puff dough. Haven't tasted butter in a while haha. 2) Instead of fake tomato sauce or little unidentifiable chunks of veggies there were whole round slices of tomato and big flavorful basil leaves on this pizza. 3) instead of globs of oil and cheese the cheese was baked into the crust, forming a crispy layer on the dough. Loved this and can't wait to get more!

Snack:

-2 pieces dark chocolate caramel wedges
-1 mug of hot green tea
*gotta love the chocolate!

Feeling wonderful, looking better, I'm finally past the hardest stage of this journey and now that I'm starting to see results I can't see why I would ever want to STOP doing this! I'm enjoying the gym immensely and I'm in a really positive place right now. For the first time instead of expecting myself to give up at some point, I can't picture myself failing. This whole experience is great. Don't get me wrong there are still tough times, but I've learned to go easy on myself and that I'm not superhuman (if I was I wouldn't be in this situation now would I?) Can't wait for spin class tomorrow. Our wednesday night instructor is awesome and plays great music so I know it'll be equally fun and challenging. Also I'm getting my hair done and that always makes me feel good! Tomorrow will be an awesome day :-)

Day 39-Valentine's Day

I hope everyone had a wonderful Valentine's day today, I know I did! I went to my friend's house and I (yes, I) actually cooked dinner for us...she couldn't believe that just barely a month ago I had no culinary skills whatsoever (I was famous for burning Mac 'n Cheese) and now I'm cooking meals for people other than myself. It's a really good feeling to add a new skill to my repertoire. I had a decent-sized breakfast, had a good snack, but accidentally missed lunch today! I guess I just went and did some errands, came home, showered and left for spin class! I was at the gym wondering why I was so hella hungry and I was going back in my head trying to remember what I ate all day when it dawned on me that I had never actually eaten lunch. Well I survived through spin class and when I came home I had a slice of deli ham since I knew I'd be eating dinner soon, I just wanted something in my stomach. Here is what I ate today (complete with awesome pictures!)

Breakfast:

-1 kashi whole grain waffle with 1/4c sugar free syrup
*yum
-1/4c egg whites
*meh
-1 trader joe hash brown
* :-)
-1 cup of coffee with 2 tbsp non-dairy creamer & 1 sweet n low
*i finally found the winning combination! The creamer was sugar free and less calories than skim milk but gave the coffee the creaminess i've been looking for since starting my diet. And there is just no substitute for sweet n low. It's sooooo good in coffee!

Snack:

-1 sugar-free chocolate pudding cup
-1 banana
*this is such a winning combo!

Lunch:

-WHOOPS-
*somehow forgot to eat lunch.

Dinner:

-2 (4oz) pieces of lean grilled chicken with a balsamic vinegar tomato glaze (tomatoes, vinegar, broth)
-some wilted spinach with 1 cup of garlic couscous
*This was an Ellie Krieger food network recipe. Each serving is 350 cal, I had 1 serving plus an extra chicken breast, so the whole thing was about 550cal.
-3 slices skim milk mozzarella cheese
-3 slices of a tomato
-5 thin slices of toasted/salted Naan

Dessert:

-5 chocolate covered strawberries
*my friend made these by hand and used organic dark chocolate. she said that 5 strawberries contained about 1/2 of the chocolate bar she used, so it wasn't actually as bad as i thought!
-1 box of message hearts
*110 cal a box, but LOTS of sugar. Oh well. They are part of valentines day! :-)

Water:

-1 bottle
*Still need to step this up considering I worked out today too!

I feel great, did a great spin class and am really enjoying my time at the gym. I took some pictures of myself to compare them since I'm at the 1-month mark, and there are noticeable differences. Not so much from front or side but most definitely the back! It's a start! My face and arms also look slightly different. Not much else to report, will probably do another weigh-in in about a week or so. I noticed that I have been eating a little more than necessary the past few days, I want to try and take it back down a bit and make sure I keep drinking that water! Anyway, time for bed, Happy v-day!

Day 38

Another awesome day! Ate well, worked out plenty! I noticed that this week I severely slacked on my water consumption, something which I will hope to rectify starting tomorrow! I'm feeling "bouncy" lately, super energized when going up the stairs and even walking around. I'm also starting to notice slight changes in the way my clothing fit. Only marginal, but noticeable nonetheless. I'm really trying to be smart about meals and about eating out, and with tomorrow being valentine's day I'm being extra careful. I made plans to go out to dinner tomorrow night but then in order to save money/eat better I offered to cook dinner for us instead, and my friend was more than supportive of this idea! I then went onto foodnetwork.com and looked up some Ellie Krieger recipes (she's the health guru of FN) and found a wonderful chicken dish as well as some side ideas. My friend then offered to make chocolate-covered strawberries with organic dark chocolate! I'm really excited because I know it will be delicious and healthy too. Now if I could just make sure I'm able to put myself together going straight from the gym to dinner! haha. Well I'm sure you're all wondering so here is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

-2 Kashi whole-grain waffles with 1/4c sugar-free syrup
*love these waffles!
-1 trader joe's hash brown
*wasn't really necessary but I've been dying to try one since I bought them...I was NOT disappointed :)
-1/2c almond milk

Lunch:

-1 battered and breaded baked chicken breast (breading: 3 garlic kashi whole grain crackers, 1/4c bran flakes, garlic powder & cayenne pepper) (batter: egg white, dijon mustard, plain fat free yogurt, lightly brushed onto chicken)
*This was an ellie krieger recipe so i know it was healthy! It was good, not GREAT but at least it was flavorful and was a much  healthier alternative to regular breaded fried chicken cutlets!
-1 cup homemade salad (romaine lettuce, olive oil, vinegar, onions, salt & pepper)
*i tried to get off some of the olive oil while eating it haha
-1/2c linguine in vodka sauce (fresh homemade)
*really didn't want to eat this but dad made it differently this time and he wanted me to try "a forkful"...it was so M-Fing delicious ahh so good and so worth it!

Dinner:

-1 turkey burger on whole wheat bun with spinach, 1/4c fat free cheddar and 1tbsp chipotle hummus
*really good, and while it's nice to be creative, I really would just like to eat a burger on a bun with ketchup and cheese. I think i'll just stick to that from now on because that's what I crave!

Snack:

-1 blueberry nonfat greek yogurt

Liquids:

-1 20oz water
-1 hot unsweetened green tea

Exercise:

-Treadmill: 30 min, weight-loss program, Alternated walking (3.5mph) with running (6mph) every 5 minutes. Worked up a HUGE sweat 
-Elliptical: 30 min, random-program, alternated going forwards and backwards every 5 min.
*And I somehow just discovered the "watch tv while you exercise" thing...I thought that music was best when working out? nah-ah. I watched TV and my hour flew by. What did I watch, you ask? Christopher Reeve in superman and enchanted. Yes, I was that girl.

Can't wait for spin and valentine's day dinner tomorrow! Will obviously post the happenings of the day :)

Day 37

Still feeling great, but didn't do as well as I should have today. I was kind of in a funk and pretty bored so that led to eating some things that I shouldn't have, but it's ok I'm ready to move on from it. Let me just say that this whole "accepting my mistakes and moving forward" thing is really refreshing. It has made such a difference in my drive and motivation to keep up my efforts. Instead of letting a mistake drag me down, I accept that I'm in no rush to lose weight and the worst that can come of a mistake is that it will be losing weight 1-day slower than I would have. For the first time I feel in control of my weight loss instead of it being in control of me and it's a beautiful feeling! Even so, I have to keep myself in check and not get carried away and not be TOO accepting of my mistakes. I need to learn from them and try to keep them few and far between. Here is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

-1 plain oatmeal packet with some blueberries
*I seriously notice a difference between quaker brand and shoprite brand...shoprite tastes better! Also the water-to-oat ratio is a little off with the quaker brand.
-1/2c almond milk
*only kind of getting used to it

Snack:

-1 decaf coffee with 1/4c fat free milk & 1 sweet and low
*would not have gotten this except my coworkers made me go on a coffee run for them. But while they were getting lattes and pound cake, I felt good knowing I got regular decaf coffee with skim milk.
-1 sugar-free vanilla pudding cup

Lunch:

-2oz whole wheat penne with some fresh marinara sauce & 1/4c fat free mozzarella cheese.
*delicious!
-2 bites of kielbasa, 2 forkfuls of fresh sauerkraut, 2 cheddar cheese perogies
*a new polish deli opened up a couple doors down from where I work and their food is sooooo good and so fresh. I haven't eaten anything there for a while since my healthy eating started so when my friend brought a small sampling of food back to work I just had to try some. I shouldn't have eaten it but I enjoyed it whole-heartedly. Those are the best kinds of mistakes.

Snack:

-6 Auntie Anne's pretzel sticks (3 cinnamon sugar and 3 regular)
*Was at the mall. A friend offered to buy and I was STARVING since I didn't anticipate going to the mall after work so I didn't bring food with me. I looked up the nutrition facts on the auntie anne's site and what I ate amounts to 405 calories...so essentially a whole meal. I didn't want to overdo things so I pretty much made this my dinner. I'm at least glad I didn't go ahead and eat another full meal in addition to this.

Snack:

-1 peach greek yogurt
*Wanted to eat something around dinnertime so I didn't succumb to other cravings

Well nothing really more to add. Already made my meals for tomorrow, tried some new recipes and I'll try to take pictures!

*Make sure to "Like" sparklydonuts on FB! www.facebook.com/sparklydonuts

Day 36

So I'm not sure if I ended up mentioning this in my post 2 days ago but I weighed myself again...grand total is 4.5 lbs. I know it doesn't seem like much at all BUT to lose weight at a healthy weight they say to lose 1-2 lbs a week. I've been doing this for about 4 weeks so I've lost about a pound or so a week. That's actually great! In the past when doing fad diets I usually lost weight much more quickly, but then I gained it back just as fast. This time I'm doing it right and it is coming off slowly but surely. Keep in mind I didn't actually start exercising regularly until a couple of weeks ago. So I'm happy! Won't weight myself now for another few weeks. Someone suggested I only do it once a month and while that sounds like a good idea I don't quite think I have the self-control for that.
I went food shopping at Trader Joe's again today and got some great stuff! I replenished my spinach and blueberries first of all. Then I bought whole wheat rolls...now every time I try to find a wheat roll they are filled with tons of ingredients and they always have at least 200 calories a roll. I've been eating my flatbreads and while they are 100 calories each they are lacking in taste. Well today I found trader joe brand whole wheat buns (real, fluffy buns) for 110 cal/each! Feel like I've hit the jackpot. My turkey burgers will taste so much better on one of those babies! I also bought some Nan (flatbread) which is great for making different kinds of pizzas & such. I then bought chipotle pepper hummus, granola bars, raspberry-filled dark chocolate squares, a frozen pizza, frozen hash browns (i think these are more breakfast-appropriate than potato pancakes), frozen panko-breaded tilapia and a curried shrimp frozen meal (trying to incorporate some fish into the diet!) Now just some notes, for anyone criticizing my choices of breaded fish, hash browns, frozen pizza or chocolate let me say this. I am a meticulous label-reader. Like, really. I will spend 10 minutes comparing 5 of the same item to try and inform myself of which one would be the absolute healthiest choice for me. Any chocolate I buy is dark chocolate first of all, with all-natural ingredients, and 2 pieces have to be under 100 calories. I also don't munch on these every day. They are for days when I really REALLY need chocolate and 2 pieces really does the trick. As for the frozen meals, I will only buy them from trader joe's. They have no preservatives and have all-natural "pronounceable" ingredients. I also only use them if I'm in a rush to leave and haven't prepared a meal already...they are great when I'm in that kind of a bind. The hash browns are surprisingly low in calories and I only eat 1 with some eggs in the morning...makes me feel like I'm eating breakfast at a diner or something. I also don't eat this every day. And as far as the breaded fish, panko breadcrumbs are substantially lighter and healthier than regular breadcrumbs, PLUS when I cook it I certainly won't be frying it! Only baked for me! I'm so glad that I have resources around me where I actually can buy things that fit my dietary needs as well as my budget.
I worked out today too, will document what I did and what I ate:

Breakfast:

-2 kashi multigrain waffles with a drizzle of sugar-free syrup
*I liked these better than the trader joe ones, and they were half the calories!
-1 strawberry greek yogurt
*so yum.
-1 cup of almond milk
*ick.

Snack:

-1 weight watchers chocolate caramel snack bar
*So I was out of the house for MUCH longer than expected today and didn't have any food with me. rather than letting myself starve I grabbed this bar because my mom had actually left it there by accident. I will now be leaving a couple granola bars in my car in case of situations like this. I really didn't want to eat it because there were so many processed ingredients in it but my stomach was growling like crazy and I had just worked out.

Lunch:

-1 home-made quesadilla: chicken breast marinated in tequila, salt and lemon on a crispy toasted flatbread with salsa and fat free cheddar cheese.
*Totally my own creation and it was so so good. The tequila added awesome flavor to the chicken, and at first I thought the liquor would add too many calories to the chicken but I ended up pouring out the majority of it (my dad would cry if he knew that).
-1 cup whole grain minestrone soup (campbells all natural light)
*i also only ate the grains and veggies and left the broth

Dinner:

-1 chicken breast, stuffed with a mixture of spinach, olives, turkey sausage and low-fat cheddar with roasted broccoli and mushrooms on the side
*This was good! I surprised myself totally with this! I just put the spinach, olives, and a couple pieces of sausage and the cheese in a blender until it was like a paste, spread it on a chicken breast than rolled that sucker up and put it in the oven for about 25 min. Came out fantastic
-1 sugar-free chocolate pudding cup
*a staple by now.

Dessert:

-2 pieces of raspberry-filled dark chocolates
*serving size is actually 4 pieces but I didn't need that much! These are good but I think I like the caramel wedges better.

Water:

-2 bottles

Gym:

-Treadmill: 30 min (weight-loss program) and Every 3 minutes I ran hard for 1 full minute.
-Elliptical: 20 min (random program, level 1)
-Track: 1 mile walking

Feeling good! I think I can probably cut out adding some "extras" to my meals...like I didn't need to have a yogurt with my waffles this morning and I didn't need to have a pudding with my dinner and THEN the chocolates. I need to stick with breakfast-snack-lunch-snack-dinner, and dessert only if seriously needed. Also, if I have a meal with chicken and vegetables, I don't need a side of anything else. I just have to train myself to not be constantly eating and sometimes when I'm bored it's really hard! But otherwise I know I'm doing great...I finally am starting to FEEL better now. I feel lighter, don't breathe heavy when going up steps etc. Really getting there! Next time I go to the gym will be sunday. :)

Day 35

Still feeling great! Sorry if these "uneventful" posts have gotten a bit boring. Some of the postings read more like a personal diary and can be monotonous, but keep in mind I can't have a milestone every day! The best I can do is just keep posting because even if tons of people aren't reading it it's what keeps me motivated! Every time I eat something I'm proud of or ashamed of, my first thought is that I have to post it for everyone to see! Today was a usual Thursday, I cooked today's food this morning just so I would be prepared for work later on. I didn't go to the gym since Thursday is not a gym day, and I plan on going tomorrow. And although I DIDN'T work out today, I stood on my feet with a camera on my shoulder for 3 hours so I think that makes up for it anyway. Now I just finished cooking tomorrow's meals, and my hands smell like garlic and pepper. YUM! Here is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

-Breakfast sandwich: 2 slices whole grain bread, 1 slice light deli ham, 1 slice lowfat swiss, 1/3c egg whites, 1 trader joe's potato pancake, 1tsp ketchup.
*This was EH. felt heavy and made my stomach hurt and I felt sick halfway through eating it. Probably won't make this again but I wanted to use up the egg beaters before they go bad...
-1c plain almond milk
*not liking it. still.

Lunch:

-1 italian chicken sausage grilled with spinach, lowfat cheddar and garlic
*delicious :)

Dinner:

-Chicken stir fry: plain chicken, broccoli, baby carrots, baby corn & sugar snap peas with soy sauce and a little chicken stock
*did.not.like.this. stir fry with JUST soy sauce is not good. felt very unsatisfied after eating this and probably won't make this again unless i alter the recipe. or at least unless i add some rice in.

Snack:

-1/2c fat free cottage cheese with some blueberries and blackberries
*yum

Snack(?)

-1 slice plain pizza
*ok story with this...dinner was completely unsatisfying and gross. I was standing with my camera and was just hungry. i wandered out into the hallway and smelled pizza, found it in the dining room went and grabbed a slice. that is all.

Snack:


-1 mug of plain unsweetened hot green tea.
*my usual.

Water:

-2.5 bottles

So far so good. I need to try to be a tiny bit stricter but I'm really proud of what I've accomplished so far! 35 days down and feeling great :)

Day 34

Feeling so good today! Ate well and went to spin class. It was a fantastic class today...the Wed night instructor (Howard) is much better than the Monday night one. I can't even explain why it's better but when you're done you really feel like you accomplished something major! His music got way better this week...he played bohemian rhapsody during our major climb and our little corner of the room started singing ...we were all so motivated. I felt great! I can't believe that less than a month ago I was pining away for spin and just aching to get back into it, and here I am pushing myself harder than ever to get myself re-acclimated to it. So so happy! In a great mood! Must be all those endorphins...I feel so proud :)
Here is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

-1 kashi cranberry walnut breakfast bar
*these don't keep me full. want to use them up fast to I can replace them with better bars!

Lunch:

-Turkey burger on sandwich thin with grilled mushrooms and spinach and red pepper spread. 
*This was just ok. I honestly think it would be more enjoyable with a tiny bit of ketchup and a slice of lowfat cheese with some lettuce and tomato on it.

Snack:

-1 trader joe's frozen whole wheat waffle with 1/4c sugar free syrup with blueberries and blackberries
*last trader joe's waffle! I now have kashi whole grain waffles...they are less calories but I'm not sure how they will taste! As for the syrup, I crushed in the berries and heated it in the microwave...smelled scrumptious and tasted just as good!
-1 cup of vanilla unsweetened almond milk
*not feelin it.

Dinner:

- 1 lean chicken breast brushed with 1tbsp olive oil, curry and cayenne pepper and grilled with "thai" peanut butter sauce (aka 1/2tsp peanut butter, 1/2tsp oil & salt) with broccoli and mushrooms.
*This was really good, I think I surprised myself with this one for sure. Gives me hope that I can actually good palatable food!

Snack:

-Raspberry mocha coffee with 1 sugar packet and dollop of fresh whipped cream
*locally brewed from a hometown coffee shop

Water:
-2 bottles

Exercise:
-1 hour-long spin class

Feeling great...I weighed myself this morning, and I'm down another pound. I actually plan on weighing myself again at the end of this week, as I think I was higher today since I kind of stuffed myself this weekend. I want to hydrate a lot this week and workout again fri and sun and then weigh myself monday morning. We'll see how that goes. At this point I was actually ok with only losing 1 additional pound, because as long as those numbers are moving down I'm happy! I am being totally honest with myself this time, and I really am excited that 1 more pound of fat is gone! I think I'm looking a TINY bit better. I am going to take another picture for myself this week and compare it to the 1st picture I took and see if I notice any difference...will keep you all posted on this! 

Day 33

Today marks 1 whole month that I've been working on getting fit. In some ways it seems to have passed quickly and in other ways it feels like I started so long ago. But 33 days is impressive, even for me. I'm proud of what I have accomplished up until this point. I feel better, look a little better and am mentally in a much better place than I was 3 months ago. I am less angry and less resentful of my metabolism. I've learned better self-control too. There are obviously still moments where boredom gets the best of me, or where temptation in a social setting proves stronger than my willpower. But considering I've only changed my ways a month ago, I'd say I'm off to a really good start. Tomorrow is spin class again, I'm excited but also hoping that I prove stronger than monday's class. It's harder to feel like I've accomplished something if I feel like I'm not working as hard as I could be.
I ate well today, glad I'm back on track. It's definitely harder to reboot after a weekend of less than healthy eating. Sugary foods definitely drive my body to crave more sugary foods. I really had to work hard today to control myself, especially since I was at work for 8 straight hours by myself. There were blueberry muffins in the drawer and I didn't eat them! Here is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

-1 packet cinnamon roll oatmeal (made with water of course)
*I ran out of the house this morning and forgot breakfast. We keep packets of oatmeal at work so I just snagged one of those out of necessity.

Snack:

-1 peach greek yogurt
*so good!

Lunch:

-1 veggie burger on whole grain sandwich flat with red pepper spread and spinach

Snack:

-1 pudding cup

Snack:

-1 can of split pea ham soup (healthy choice)
*not sure if I should count this as snack or as "dinner part 1"...I was at work and hungry but I don't think was enough for dinner, especially since I ate this at 5pm which is early for dinner.

Dinner:

-1 cup of beef stew
-1 cup of salad with romaine lettuce, onions, olive oil & vinegar

I was in a huge rush this morning and since I hadn't cooked last night I planned on grabbing a can of soup and a frozen pizza from trader joe's that I had hiding in the freezer. Well apparently it wasn't hiding well enough because a sister who will remain nameless took it and ate it. I literally have been writing my name on all the food I buy because if no one claims it someone will eat it. I was so incredibly angry at her for it but what was I going to do. I hate feeling rushed and trying to put food together in a hurry. To avoid that same situation tomorrow I cooked tonight. Glad that's over and done with. Looking forward to more gym adventures tomorrow! 1 month down, who knows how many more to go! 

Day 32

Tomorrow will officially be 1 month of eating healthy and blogging! It's actually gone by pretty fast so far. I've done well most of these 32 days and now that I've been exercising I really feel a whole lot better. I have more energy, a spring in my step and I never feel gross or full or have indigestion. My skin seems to be glowing, and other people have actually voluntarily said the same to me. Friends have noticed some weight loss and that makes me feel great! I did well today, I did go out to eat tonight and I didn't eat perfectly, but I didn't do badly either. I maintained a good middle ground. From now on though, I think I need to be armed with a better knowledge of some key restaurants where I can eat and know I at least stand half a chance of ordering something healthy. Most chain restaurants (we went to Houlihan's) only offer one or two sometimes appetizing items on their menu. I would like to at least have a small database in my head of health-conscious restaurants so that before I go out I already have a list of places to choose from instead of trying to wing it once I'm already out. That would be extremely helpful. I worked out today, went to spinning. It was tougher today for some reason. I guess I shouldn't expect to be able to continue full force after not working out for 6 months, since I think my body and muscles are changing rapidly right now and my strength is shifting around, and until it kind of stabilizes some classes will be harder than others. But I did work up a good sweat so I know I burned major calories! Anyways, here is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

-2 slices whole grain toast with 2 tbsp low sugar peanut butter
-1 cup unsweetened vanilla almond milk
(*this was pretty disappointing. I guess it's only tasty when it is sweetened but I don't wanna go there. Once I'm done with it I'm just going to switch to regular milk again)

Lunch:

-1 italian chicken sausage link grilled with peppers & onions and served over 1/2 c brown rice with 1/4 c low fat mozzarella cheese.
*This. Was. Delicious. The sausage I bought this week was ten times better than the one I had previously purchased. I also took a tip from some diet gurus and ate my meal off of a small plate instead of a big one...I think psychologically it tricks your mind into thinking you ate more or something to that effect.

Dinner:

-Grilled chicken fajitas (4 small flour tortillas, strips of grilled chicken, grilled peppers/onions, shredded cheddar cheese, salsa, guac and sour cream)
*The salsa, chicken and veggies were no big thing...i'm sure the tortillas and toppings added up a bit though. I admit when I was looking at the menu I had a brief desire to cross over to the dark side and order buffalo chicken but I took control and I think I did a little better in the long run.

I seriously slacked with water intake today. I drank 1 bottle during spinning and one large glass of unsweetened iced tea when I was out. But I'm SO THIRSTY right now I'm about to go downstairs and get a huge glass of seltzer to guzzle down before bed. I notice that I haven't been thirsty in almost a month because I've constantly been hydrating. Between yesterday and today I didn't drink much water and man am I noticing it! Tomorrow I work all day so I'm bringing food with me. I got home late tonight and didn't cook but I already know in my head what I'll be taking with me so I'm not worried! We also  have a poland spring jug at work so I'll have an almost endless supply of H20. 

Days 30 & 31

Sorry for not posting yesterday, I came home and pretty much just passed right out, I was really tired...so I'm including both days in tonight's post.

DAY 30

So yesterday I worked half of the day then went out to dinner. I'm proud to say that I did really well regardless of the fact that I went out to eat. I also didn't drink any alcohol either so that's a plus! I did have a bite of brownie but I'm not concerned about that. Here is what I ate yesterday:

Breakfast:

-1 packet plain oatmeal with half a macintosh apple chopped and a sprinkle of cinnamon

Lunch:

-1 Trader Joe's personal pizza: Garden vegetable (whole wheat crust, eggplant, zucchini, squash, tomatoes, basil & spinach)
*This was so good (albeit i'd give it an "F" for presentation) and really filling.

Snack:

-2 spoonfuls of minestrone
-1 Greek Yogurt
*I had originally just wanted the cup of soup to be my snack. But somehow when I poured it out of the can all I managed to get was broth and the remainder stayed at the bottom. Realizing there wasn't much substance to just broth I threw it out and opted for the protein-rich yogurt instead.

Dinner:

-1 cobb salad (romaine lettuce, blue cheese crumbles, bacon bits & hard-boiled eggs) with very small cup of vinaigrette with grilled chicken
*I don't think this was a bad choice at all. I opted for the vinaigrette instead of a creamy dressing, the eggs were good, romaine is good, blue cheese is fine, the bacon wasn't great but it was a small price to pay, and I made sure to add grilled chicken on top for substance.

Snack:

-1 bite of a home made brownie.
*it was delicious and worth it.

DAY 31

Today I filled in for someone at work and definitely had a workout while doing it. I was in a building where I constantly had to go up and down 3 massive flights of stairs and carry heavy loads around. I did that from about 9-12, and followed a mascot running around for another 3 hours. I actually also planned on going to the gym, brought my gym clothes and everything, then realized i forgot...sneakers :-( I was really bummed because I did want to go workout and I was totally ready for it! So instead I just went to shoprite and got Chicken Sausage, Turkey Burgers, low fat swiss, low fat deli ham, fat free mozzarella, fat free cheddar, sugar-free chocolate puddings, veggie burgers and almond milk. Tried to buy stuff that was versatile and would last me a couple weeks so I wouldn't have to constantly be spending money! So I'm happy with my purchases. Now as far as my eating today, I didn't do well at all. But you know what? I wanted to indulge myself today so that I wouldn't go completely bezerk and binge later on, and I really thoroughly enjoyed everything that I ate today and didn't take any of it for granted. In fact, eating like I did today just refueled my fire to eat well and exercise! Tomorrow is another day and I'm ready to take on the world again! Here is what I ate today. Beware, it's a lot. But I'm so proud of myself for being able to just move on after a day like today. That's a huge behavioral improvement for me!

Breakfast:

-1 kashi cranberry walnut bar
*Started off fine...

2nd Breakfast:

-1 strawberry croissant
-1/2 chocolate chip bagel w/ butter
-1c mixed fruit
-1 small apple juice
*Sugar much? So delicious though.

Lunch:
-Remains from the cobb salad from last night
-1 cup diet iced tea
*Wasn't so bad. Could have had water instead though.

Snack:

-1/2 raisin bagel (plain)
- A couple hot tamale candies
*This was because it was in front of me, not because I was really hungry.

Dinner:

-1c turkey chili (tomatoes, beans, ground lean turkey, jalapenos, spices) - home made.
-1 tbsp home-made guacamole
-A serving of home-made nachos (trader joe's veggie flax tortilla chips, pepper jack cheese, jalapenos)
-4 cocktail weiners
*Aside from the hot dogs, my friend tries to make healthy food...I think she definitely succeeded with her dishes! They were definitely healthy alternatives to normal superbowl sunday foods.

Dessert:

-2 glasses sparkling wine
-some strawberries with organic sugar on top
-1 italian "S" cookie.
*We toasted to the superbowl...even though we both dislike football.

You know what? I really enjoyed myself today. I don't feel guilty, I don't feel fat, I'm not upset with myself. I had fun, enjoyed myself with friends in a social setting and I didn't get angry or feel left out like I sometimes do when I'm trying to lose weight. I'm ready to move on to tomorrow and just keep on going!

Day 29

Sorry for posting this late, I was out and this is the only time I have to write. Today was an interesting day. It started off really well. I was eating well, I went to the gym for an hour, drank a LOT of water and I felt really good about myself. I'm even starting to notice that I look a little different in the mirror. The night didn't go as well, but I'm still not going to let it bring me down. I was at a friend's house and about an hour ago I started getting really hungry. I then realized that I probably didn't eat enough for the day, especially since I spent time at the gym. So first I just took a handful of peanuts...then I ate a cheese stick. Then I realized that continuously snacking was not going to help me at all, so I made some whole wheat pasta with all natural jarred tomato sauce. I also ate a handful of hand-made chocolates that my friend whipped up this week. I'm not proud of what I did, but I'd like to think that part of this process is being able to accept and move on from my misgivings. A few weeks ago I would have been a wreck over the thought of what I did tonight. Instead I realize that it's just another day out of the rest of my life and tomorrow is a new day. Although I would like to be careful, since I'm going out tomorrow, Sunday and Monday night with friends and would like to be mindful of what I eat. This weekend might be where I face a little "lull" or potentially see a lapse in judgement occurring. The key is to just power through it like I have been for these 4 weeks. Today makes 4 weeks exactly, actually, and Monday will be a month, which is when I will weigh myself and mark my progress so far. Here is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

- 1/4c egg whites with 1 1/2 slices light deli ham, 1/4c lowfat cheddar, peppers mushrooms and onions
- 1 Trader Joe's potato pancake with 1 tsp ketchup
*I severely UNDERestimated how much egg I would need this time. First too much, now too little. This little breakfast scramble amounted to maybe 4 forkfuls of food. And it was just OK.

Lunch:

- 1 chicken sausage link sauteed with peppers, onions & spinach over 1/2c brown rice.
*This was good but not very satisfying or filling at all. Yummy though.

Snack:

-1 peach Chobani greek yogurt.
*so so so delicious. Kept me filled too.

Dinner:

- 1 stuffed pepper
- 2 pudding cups (1 vanilla 1 chocolate)

Late-Night Mess:

- 1 oz salted peanuts
- 4 pieces handmade chocolate
- 2 oz whole wheat pasta with 1/4c jarred all-natural sauce

I know I could have done much worse, but the fact that I consumed a pretty good amount of sugar combined with the fact that I ate it late will only hinder whatever progress I make. But it's ok, tomorrow is a new day and I intend to really be mindful of what I eat when I go out, especially since I'm going to a bar. 1 light drink. That's it. Plus any workouts I can squeeze in will be a bonus! 

Day 28

Another day down, one step closer to a full month. This whole "take it a day at a time" thing seems to really be working for me! I did well today although temptation reared its ugly head more than once. Note to self: Don't watch shows about baking as your sister is baking in the kitchen while you're on a diet. No good ever comes out of it! My sister made corn muffins, which aren't anything special but when you haven't eaten any baked goods in a month anything with butter in it smells glorious. Additionally, my one favorite dish is eggplant meatballs, which my dad happened to make and they were just sitting there on the kitchen table, and though it was just above a whisper I heard them calling my name. Seriously. BUT I somehow had the willpower to reject them and say "no, no. I have a date with another food this evening but thanks for your offer". I instead turned to the food I had cooked last night and was proud of myself for not giving in. Here is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

- 2 slices whole wheat bread with 2 tbsp reduced sugar peanut butter.
- 1 cup skim milk

Lunch:

- 1 stuffed pepper: green bell pepper stuffed with brown rice, spinach, tomatoes, mushrooms, peppers, onions & capers, drizzled with blood orange-infused olive oil & topped with a pinch of parmesan cheese:

*I can't believe I made this. I. MADE. THIS. Miss can't cook to save her life made something so delicious and healthy! It was satisfying and full of so much flavor.
- 1 sugar-free chocolate pudding cup

Snack:

- 2 tbsp garden vegetable hummus with some baby carrots and raw broccoli
*This was good, this was more commercial hummus. It was still full of all-natural ingredients but in no way as good as the one from Trader Joe's. Kept me full though.

Dinner:

- 1 chicken breast stuffed with 1/2 slice swiss cheese, 1 slice lowfat deli ham, spinach and mushrooms
- 1 cup broccoli
*The chicken was super dry. Mom made it. Blame falls on her.

Dessert:

- 1 whole grain waffle with 1 tbsp chocolate pudding & 1 tbsp peanut butter
*I had the most ridiculous sugar craving (probably from watching baking shows) and I didn't want to cave in and eat the muffins my sister made or the brownies in the cabinet but I needed sweet, and more than my usual fix. So I made up this little solution. I ended up eating the whole pudding cup also but I'm not concerned.

I already made some food for tomorrow and plan on doing a "on-my-own" gym day. Meaning no class, just me running on the treadmill. I need to strategize so that I can go when no one is there! I bid you all adieu until tomorrow.

Day 27

I'm feeling really good right now. Happy, proud, in control. These are the kind of days I'd like to hold on to! I went to the gym today and did what was probably the hardest spin class I've ever been to in my life. I'm still not sure how I feel about the instructor (who is the king of butt crack) but he really knew how to push us hard. There were so many moments in that hour that I didn't think I could do it...but I just kept thinking of other things...kept my mind occupied. And each thought I had (whether it be what I planned on cooking, or what errands I had to run) used up another couple minutes and before I knew it we were done and I had accomplished so much! I am definitely going to be attending Monday AND Wednesday spin from now on! Today was also a good eating day, I'm trying (slowly) to get more creative with my meals since I know I could succumb to getting bored or tired of the same old thing all the time. Here is what I ate today:

Breakfast:

- 2 trader joe's whole wheat frozen waffles with (a concoction I made) 1/4c sugar-free syrup, some blueberries, some blackberries and some bananas heated up into some kind of fruit syrup.

It was delicious, the bananas were ooey gooey and sugary sweet...have a look! This was so good and it felt like I was eating out at a restaurant! There was no added sugar in any of the topping, it was all natural :-)

Lunch:

- 2oz whole grain pasta, some cheddar, mozzarella & swiss melted on top, with broccoli, tomatoes and red pepper flakes.
*This was good, but disastrous to make. I tried to get a little TOO creative, tried making my own mac 'n cheese sauce...the result was a lot of milk with cheese stuck to the bottom. I gave up on that and just sprinkled some cheese on the pasta after it was cooked and voila! the cheese melted right on. Should have just tried that in the first place!
- 1 sugar-free vanilla pudding cup

Dinner:

- Veggie burger on whole wheat sandwich thin with spinach, mushrooms, onions and red pepper spread
*I want to try eating sandwhiches without cheese (or at least less-often) because I seem to use cheese as a flavor crutch...let me tell you cheese was NOT necessary this time! The pepper spread and mushrooms gave it a really good flavor! Very happy with this.

Snack/Dessert:

- 1 light fat-free vanilla yogurt with (once again my own recipe): blueberries, raspberries, lemon juice and a touch of honey heated up into a fruit syrup. I added this into the yogurt.

This was the end result. I thought it looked pretty cool, tasted really good too! The fruit heated with the honey turned the whole mixture into a dark red sauce. Delicious! I'm glad I chose to eat this, because I was watching Groundhog Day and Bill Murray was constantly eating danishes, cake, pie, cupcakes, donuts...all the stuff I crave...and seeing him eating it made me want something sweet so badly, so I made the yogurt-thing up instead and it took care of my sweet tooth. What a relief.

Hopefully tomorrow will be just as successful as today...I have work all day but Thursdays are usually fairly busy so I know I will be kept occupied. I also made some DELICIOUS meals for tomorrow but you're all going to have to wait until then to find out what they are! No worries, I took pictures :-)